Deleting the bad

Life is too short. I'm deleting the bad. Too many wonderful things in life to have draining, negative relationships. Done with it. Focusing on the good.

Finding a balance for healing

I'm feeling so much better but have been told over and over again not to push it. Not to try to do too much too quickly. What exactly does that mean? I went for a little walk today because I was told that would speed healing. I didn't unload the dishwasher because I as told that could cause complications. I took a nap today because I was told that I needed sleep to help my body heal. I didn't lay in bed all day because I was told that would cause blood clots.

All seems so contradictory to me.

In any case I'm ready to get back into the swing of everything. Ready to get back on my bike and lose about 50 pounds before Christmas.

Thankful for an easy surgery and quick recovery.

Recovery

Today I went for a little ride in the car and became car sick rather quickly. The kids came home today so I haven't slept all day. I am glad to see them but definitely see I am going to have to fight for a nap. Jackson is being so sweet. While I laid down in my bed he brought his blocks into my room and played quietly on the floor. He's trying to be so sweet and helpful. He has a hard time remembering not to climb in my lap but that's okay- a little pain is worth all of the cuddles and kisses.

Again, I'm not feeling much pain. I'm mostly tired and feel like I could sleep all the time. So thankful the pain has been minimal.

Whew!

That's over! I am feeling fine and haven't had much pain. I definitely have slept more this week than I have in my entire life. Anxious to get back to 100%.

I'm beginning to plan curriculum purchases for next year. I'm definitely doing COVA for Emily Kate next year. Excited about being apart of that program again. I think it will be what we'll need for next year. Jackson is going to Part-time Kindergarten next year at TCA. He'll be one 3 mornings or afternoons a week next year. In addition to TCA for Jackson we'll do Kindergarten Science/Literature program. Lauren will continue with TCA part-time.

All in all we have a good start on our plans for next year. Until then we need to finish this year. Summer plans are filling up quickly and we do not know how we'll fit it all in this summer.

The 23rd of March

On the 23rd of March I will give up my ability to ever have another child. Dramatic? Absolutely. I do not believe in evolution. I believe God created humans with unique abilities in the likeness of Him. Part of that reflection of him is the desire to nurture and bring forth life. It's how I was created. I no longer will be able to do what I was created to do. Yes. Dramatic I know! Thankfully, I am more complex than a baby making machine. This is a new chapter in my life.

I will not miss the monthly visits from Aunt Polly nor the craziness that the monthly visits brought. I am a little nervous. Of course, I'm nervous I don't like pain and I definitely am not finished living. I'd be a fool not to be nervous. However, I have a good doctor. I have a great husband who is going to take care of me. It will be fine.

Let it be spring.....

There has been very little snow this winter. No storm of 2008/09 to spin tales about for years to come. In Colorado our Spring rain is most likely coming down in the form of snow.

Yesterday it snowed in the morning but by lunch the snow had melted and the sky was blue. To top the day off there was a mini-blizzard around 4:00. Spring is here in Colorado. There are no flowers, green grass or budding trees to be reminded of Spring's promise of new life. Instead, the months of March, April and May bring frequent changes of weather that require a winter coat one day and shorts the next.

But when it comes, when Spring delivers on its promise of new life there is nothing comparable. Wild flower fields against a majestic backdrop of soaring mountains and star lit nights are indescribably beautiful. So wait Spring as long as you need we don't mind.

Hospitality vs. Entertaining

I've been wondering lately, what is true hospitality? Can you be hospitable with dust on your furniture and cobwebs in your corners? When you take in someone for the night and all you have to offer them is a freshly made bed with wrinkled sheets is that hospitality? What about making a dinner go from 4 servings to 8 servings just so you can share a meal? Is that hospitality? Or must hospitality be full blown six course meal, dust free house, designer fabrics, model home furniture, clean wood floors and no fingerprints on pictures or windows? I can't tell you how many times I do not listen to my instinct and invite someone over because my house isn't clean enough, pretty enough or I only have leftovers to offer. Hospitality is about the other person not about me. Hospitality should be about their needs while entertaining is all about how I want others to think of me. Mary and Martha. Without Martha the house may have been dirtier and the food not as plentiful. Somehow though I think God would have worked through that mess and those less than perfect meal servings.

Martha practiced entertaining. Mary practiced hospitality. Do I practice hospitality or only entertaining?

Perspective

Dr. Seuss said, "Don't cry because it's over-smile because it happened". I am loving that man. Green Eggs and Ham and Horton Hears a Who are two of our favorite children's book ever written.

It is about perspective when something happen in life. There are people who fall over dead when they miss their favorite TV show. Other people face what seems like insurmountable difficulties (a child's illness or death, bad news a the doctor's, a loss of a job, a house fire, etc,) and seem to be pillars of strength and resolve. It's not the level of difficulty or tragedy we face that determines what our reaction should be- that is all subjective. It's our perspective in the middle of the storm that determines our reaction. I wonder, are we born with perspective, can we learn a new perspective, can we train our minds and hearts to perceive things differently?

All things Graham Crackers

Icing on graham crackers, graham cracker cereal, graham cracker crust with cheesecake topping and the creme del e creme (if that's how you spell it) SMORES. These are the things I love. I really thought graham cracker's were a staple in the American home until today when it became clear that not all American families eat graham crackers. Not understanding how this is even possible. It's like saying, we've never been inside a Wal-mart, we haven't had a taco, we have never eaten chocolate cake with vanilla icing. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE????

Helping Emily Succeed

As I type this, Emily is across the table tackling 3 math worksheets. She refuses to let me help her. I get the feeling she's done with needing extra help. Done as in- fed up with. I have to constantly remind myself that every day Emily faces a new day of challenges. Sure, I think some days are easier than others for her. She has great days. Even just taking her medication is a reminder that her brain is different. Her brain doesn't work the way the rest of our brains do and she is especially reminded of that when we start school. My poor girl. I wish I could make learning easy for her all the time. I wish I could take away the frustrations she experiences with school.